Anyone who has had a pet will know that they become part of the family. However, many legal systems across the world still consider pets to be “property” to be distributed when relationships break down. While some jurisdictions treat pets as sentient beings, not just an item of property, this doesn’t necessarily make the decision about who keeps the pet any easier.
This book provides an invaluable resource for understanding how best to manage what happens with pets when a relationship breaks down and people move into different residences. Karis Nafte brings more than 25 years as an animal behaviour expert, and her skills as a certified family mediator to help individuals and mediators make the right decisions in the best interests of the pet.
She describes three major stumbling blocks in deciding what is in a pet’s best interests: humanizing, weaponizing and bargaining. She discusses how the type of pet, the breed, and whether it was a rescue animal or brought into the family as a puppy/kitten can impact on what will be best for the animal. She also explains some of the challenges with shared custody arrangements, which can frequently create problems for the animal even though the humans are well-intentioned.
The book includes many stories of real situations in which people had to decide on pet custody. Some are heartbreaking and some are heartwarming. There are also two letters written from the perspective of a dog, and from an owner to their dog at the end of the process, which are hard to read but also inspiring if you’ve ever had to say goodbye to a loved animal.
This book is an easy to read, compassionate and practical guide for making decisions about who gets the pet when a relationship breaks down. All family mediators should add this to their essential reading list.
